Saturday, 9 June 2018

I'm Not a Girly-Girl but I Look Like One

Processing It All

My style ID is Romantic Ethereal Ingenue and I feel both entirely unsurprised as well as utterly shocked. 

My personality may not be what girly-girl is typically understood to be but then why should that matter?  Do I owe it to anyone to be exactly what I appear to be?  In some ways it's a decision that is already made for me.  I have the face I have and it unarguably looks best next to a lot of lace, ruffle and delicate detail.  Putting it next to simpler lines, harder lines, stronger and bolder shapes does nothing of any use. 

Next to the Romantic Ethereal Ingenue lines, I look like myself. I look healthier, happier, prettier, kinder, more competent, and more present.  I can't really find a reason to object to those things.  I used to resist the idea of styling myself to be visible because the only way I understood that concept was styling myself flamboyantly and I knew that didn't suit me.  Why would I want to be visible while not looking like myself?  I would rather be invisible.

I am not rushing out to the shops just yet and I can't really justify new purchases at the moment although there are a few things on the wish list and if I am tempted to make any impulse purchases I have a better idea of what is unlikely to be regrettable.  I have some key words in mind and some mental images.  Browsing some shopping sites online last night I noticed that ruffles seem to be in, though I see very little of my good colours.

Going forward I think the main approach will be to focus on softly draping fabric in light, soft, warm colours, to keep growing my hair into a long wavy style, add some jewelry and appropriate scarves, stop worrying that makeup doesn't work too well for me and embrace the fact that a very very little goes a long way.

My best look is soft and feminine and I've been fighting it when there is no need to.  It's a bit of a relief to figure that out!

I don't know if or when I might be sharing any photos of what I am wearing.  It's out of my comfort zone and never feels to me like it's effective.  But sharing images I am collecting for inspiration on Pinterest is quite doable.  One challenge is that I essentially suit things that look like wedding dresses.  Time to search for my inner princess.

If you've read my blog for awhile you may recall I had an interest in the Mori Girl look.  No wonder I did.  It's Romantic and Ingenue, though it tends to have a dash of Natural added to it. This dress below appeals to me though in the past I would have felt guilty about that.  As though I were stuck in childhood.


I would definitely pull this lace thing off the rack in a store although I might be a little stuck on what to pair it with.  It would be great with a sun dress, and probably also improve a tank top which always looks so harsh and bland on me.

                                         Source unknown-Pinterest says bad link

If this dress came in a warm colour I would wear it.  Where would I wear it?  That I do not know.


 Best to explore things I can pair with jeans...

I have to admit these sleeves would annoy me if they are long and I would prefer them around elbow length.   I know long bell sleeves are a good look, but I do require my clothing not to get in the way.  I could wear this first blouse for sitting around and looking pretty while I read a book.

                                                    Source-Mod Cloth


Basically I would do well to shop at Anthropologie or ModCloth but I haven't got access to either.  I already do have some things which are heading in the right direction.  My instincts were at work even though I was unaware of it and perhaps only dipping my toes in.

Fine, delicate knits which drape softly are good.  No hard edges here!  The overall outfit would be best with more detail added in accessories.


Soft, ethereal looking things tend to be rendered in light, cool colours except cream is popular for lace.  The ornate, ethereal types of jewelry are more likely to be silver but pearls are good and I have lots of them.


This one is very Kibbe Soft Classic. You can see the symmetry and balance.  It is something I would have chosen before learning how much embellishment I need but I could add some.   It would be wonderful with a light weight, softly flared skirt or even ruffles. 

                                                     Source-unknown/bad link


I have always known that peter pan collars were good on me.  They aren't always easily found though.  Shirt style blouses and pointed collars are one of the worst things you can put on me.  All that advice about the crisp white shirt, trench coat and black pencil skirt that every woman is supposed to have is directing me towards some of my most unflattering garments. Even a shirt in soft, light fabric is too sharp and pointy.

Love this blouse!  The model has it sharpened up a bit with her red lip, updo and black skirt which are pushing the blouse into something more classic because she probably hasn't got much or any Ingenue in her style id mix.  There is some sharpness in her facial bones and a slight look of danger in her expression.  You won't ever get that in my face.


Black is out but the style is good.  This reads as Ethereal Ingenue in blend because the general shape is Ingenue and the sheer fabric combined with light fabric adds a touch of Ethereal.



The downside to discovering that I am better in gold than silver is the cost.  I suppose I also have myself to blame in that I don't like costume jewelry so I want the real thing.


In many ways I need to think of bridal styles for jewelry and accessories.  My style id is fairly accurately described as fairy princess ( not to be confused with Disney Princess ) and many bridal styles are aiming for a fairy princess effect.

This is really an interesting journey for me as my instincts are to avoid frou frou.  But I have seen with my own eyes how good it looks.



I think instinct has always told me that a little something fancy near my face is a good idea as I wear scarves almost year round.  They aren't so good for hot weather though so I will want to find a necklace to do the job of fancying my neck. The scarf focus needs to be on soft and draping fabric, and some chiffon.  Ruffled edges and lacy crochet are also good.

Also I must convince this woman to give me her scarf.


You might be wondering about hats.  I've always loved hats and have experimented with various styles.  Because I like certain styles which don't actually suit me I have stubbornly refused to listen to other people who told me they didn't suit me.  I love a newsboy cap.  However, I am now very aware of how my hat needs are softer and more feminine, not tomboyish.  Large and floppy brims don't work well, perhaps because they have a Dramatic element.  I can pull off a wider brimmed straw sunhat if it is not too large or stiff but I have always struggled with straw hats and the reason may be that they are just not soft enough.

Given that I want softness, femininity, downward lines or S curves, I think a hat that is a very soft cloche is a good idea.  I also have a soft knit beret which seems to be flattering.

This hat might be good.  Braid shapes read like S curves and there is definitely softness here, no sharp lines or angles.


This style might work.  It has a great vintage vibe-1910-1935 seems to be the right sort of vintage for this Style ID type.  I would put a softer flower on it.


I did have a velvet cloche once and it worked quite well for me but it was not a good colour.

Well, reality is still a jeans sort of life and a preference for clothing and accessories which don't get in my way.  I certainly know what I need if I am going somewhere that requires fancy dress but this isn't about turning my daily wear into a costume.

The Plan

I will amp up my  accessorising a little and focus on delicately feminine and ornate styles.

I will focus on keeping as many clothing choices as possible soft, draped, delicate and consider ruffles and lace, diagonal curves and limit if not totally avoid geometric lines and sharp edges.

 I will not worry about some of my taste reading as too young. (MaryJanes) Chances are high that it doesn't look wrong on me.

I will stick to my guns about unconstructed shapes though avoid stiff, voluminous or boxy ones too.

I will interpret my Autumn palette in a soft, ethereal, lighter and non-earthy way.

I will continue to keep makeup minimal and stop trying to make it more 'grown up' which doesn't work and only looks hard and over done too quickly even when the colours are good.


  1. I love this: "Next to the Romantic Ethereal Ingenue lines, I look like myself, I look healthier, happier, prettier, kinder, more competent, and more present." I think that's the key, and ultimately each of us would be so much happier if we wear clothes that make us feel a better and more genuine version of ourselves. I can understand why your explorations made you feel both surprised and unsurprised. I agree, that it sort of both a new and old idea (regarding your personal style) at the same time. :) Somehow it makes sense, even though you moved away from your earlier discoveries!

    Did I tell you? When I watched Downton Abby, one of the main characters (Mary, I think, her name is) reminded me of you - perhaps you have a similar background. And of course it is exactly that period of history and fashion you're talking about - 1919-1930s. Extremely feminine, and often soft.

    What an exciting journey it must have been for you! Happy discoveries, my dear! <3

    1. Thanks for your sweet encouragement, Natalia! It is that delightful mix of calm and excitement in finally seeing myself properly. I have seen some of Downton Abby and I know what you mean. I am very attracted to that styling and I do see myself in it. I also do relate to Mary. She has more dramatic than I do. She is a bit like crossing me with my Mum. I think it makes sense because my old ideas were almost right. I was getting close but when something wasn't right I moved away instead of refining it. Since you quoted me I have spotted the run on sentence. Must fix that! LOL Thanks for you thoughtful comment. xoxo


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